near the end of 2009

right, so here I'm back

trying to get my blog working again

the last post...was summer ;P

Now

I'm in Taiwan, Taipei to be specific, and doing uni, studying International Business

life as a college student, is cool.

Parties every weekend (ok.. I work on Friday and Saturdays, so my weekend is literary only Sunday :p) go shopping once in a while, movies occasionally :P

have seen:

New moon (well...... its a movie full of hot bodies and damn looking guys :P)

Avatar (Must see No.1 Its way better than 2012!!! although im not a great fan of 3D movies, but this is so coooooooooooool!!! ) I see you~~~~~~ <3>

2012 (right.. sorta a waste of money)

Christmas Carols (pure entertainment)

and I think im gonna go see Sherlock Holmes someday :P

and school's ok classes are boring (well theres my English class which I think is pretty cool :P I can come and go to classes at my own will) Accounting is making no sense to me at all!!!! its weird have your text book in English and the teacher babbling away in Chinese.... It takes me forever trying to figure whats she talking about...

and yeah singing!!!!!!!!!! This is something I recently picked up :D Man I think I have fell in love with Karaoke XD Its addictive ^^

and now.... 4 days till new years.... 2010

2009 is ending... and I still havnt got myself a boyfriend.... eh

probably being single is a good choice... too much sorrow for oneself isnt good :)

so yeah thats about what Ive been doing since summer * busted...you're just rambling *

and I hope the Christmas cards would arrive around New Years.. :D

I honestly dont trust taiwanese post XD

letting go

three years ago, 

the wind blew me here, 
the birds cut off my strings 
allowing me to stay.

three years later
with the time to repair 
to explore and adventure the place they let me call home, 

the wind blows again
going with the flow, 
I open my thin sheets of paper
allowing the wind to take me
high,
high up.

My journey has began.

__

http://www.lanyue.com/html/49/629749-16176.html

Hold On!!

In less than 3 weeks, the IB May 09 finals will take place ><  and our teachers are not even finished with the syllabus! 

Easter just ended yesterday, and during this 10 day of vaca, supposely I should have did some revision, and I did, I went to Stockholm for study course, esp for my Economis, I was there 4 days., and the proper course took 2 days, and oh boy was it intense!! But I had fun too, met two swedish guys that were really nice and cute too ;) 

And now Im back in Oslo, cloudy mild weather, studying hard memorizing dates for history, formulas for math, names and functions for bio, definitions for economics, grammer and literary devices for english and chinese I say this is INTENSE :O 

Good news is every thing will be done in 1month and before that!! the Norwegians have they AWESOME nationalday and graduation events that is SOMETHING to look forward to ^^

Bad news...... Taiwan will be waiting for me in 2 months time :)

:D

Yeah, people, I want to add you on Skype, so if you have a user name  send a private message to me, or tell me if you don’t mind others seeing it ^^ due to the fact that I will be leaving soon….. I feel the need to stay in touch with my precious friends!! :D :D 

who am I?

“If there’s so much I must be, can I still just be me? The way I am…”

This is a line from Lion King 2. I paused a second to think about it, and it struck me so suddenly, isn’t this how I feel now?! With so many choices in front of me, so many opportunities at hand, so many changes I need to make, so many things to do, so much pressure but so little time.

It struck me when I was filling out forms for my uni apps back home, it is to be sent out in 7 more days, my decision still sways from on to another, cant decide for the special ten. Is it really time to decide my future? Can’t I leave this in fates hand, ask him kindly to lead me where he thinks suits me best? However, how would he know what is best for me when he doesn’t even understand me. Leaving the decision to me.

I know what I want to study, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that is what I want to become.

Being a manager is quite tedious, but seeing the smiles on peoples face when they see what you have done to make them happy is the greatest satisfaction I can ask for.

Being a diplomat, tracing my fathers footstep, would be both exciting, stressing, and many sleepless nights. Traveling around the world, stopping at famous locations, visiting old friends, making new ones as you go along; and don’t forget the advantages you can get with a status like this. But, personally speaking, I think diplomats are fake, they smile at you when they don’t want to; they laugh at your jokes even if they don’t think its funny; they don’t offend anyone; they keep everything at its best. Not saying that this is bad, but, I don’t like it.

I just wana be me………but who am I?

new home <3

Bye Bye Neuberggaten, Hello Bogdstavien :P
Yeah, New Year, New Home :P
Its a really beautiful place fulled of modern arts, only the colors of red, black, white and probably silver, very neat and clean and easy :D but one thing...its really small. I ended up sharing a room with my evil brother (:P)
The best part is its only 2 minutes away from the subway :P :P
SO....this will be my home for now until June :)

Its Christmas!!

YEah!!!! :D :D 

Alien Wishes everyone a Happy Christmas :) 

*so random*

announced...

The Time has come for the snail to change its shell...

The Time has come for the objects owned to be packed...

The Time has come for the young to get used to the new environment....

The Time has come for the old to decide whats best for them, and others....

The Time is running away, it is not waiting for anyone, no matter how hard you beg, her only answer is 'move on'...

Time has given her mercy to her followers, allowing her to stay with the ones she care of in this White Paradise till the fading of the third cycle of 30days. After that, one shall depart the circle of four, leaving the young and dependent behind.

The faith of the one of the three, is still.....in the hands of Time.

The snail's new shell is only 500 meters away from her old one......the snail can not get used to drastic changes in such a short period.... however, at the end of the summer, the snail shall travel across the pacific or the great land of Eastern Europe, Soviet Russia and the mother land of Mao, back to where she has been told, where she belongs....

The snail herself does not know where she truly belongs..... where is the place she can call 'home'?

not a bad job

I just checked my Toefl iBT scores. I took the test on the 21st of November :D :D

Test	Test Date	Reading	Listening	Speaking	Writing	Total
TELXML	November 22, 2008	23	28	24	24	99

and the under is the explanation of my skills

Reading Skills	Level	Your Performance
Reading	High(22-30)	Test takers who receive a score at the HIGH level, as you did, typically understand academic texts in English that require a wide range of reading abilities regardless of the difficulty of the texts. Test takers who score at the HIGH level, typically have a very good command of academic vocabulary and grammatical structure; can understand and connect information, make appropriate inferences, and synthesize ideas, even when the text is conceptually dense and the language is complex; can recognize the expository organization of a text and the role that specific information serves within the larger text, even when the text is conceptually dense; and can abstract major ideas from a text, even when the text is conceptually dense and contains complex language.
Listening Skills	Level	Your Performance
Listening	High(22-30)	Test takers who receive a score at the HIGH level, as you did, typically understand conversations and lectures in English that present a wide range of listening demands. These demands can include difficult vocabulary (uncommon terms, or colloquial or figurative language), complex grammatical structures, abstract or complex ideas, and/or making sense of unexpected or seemingly contradictory information. When listening to lectures and conversations like these, test takers at the HIGH level typically can understand main ideas and important details, whether they are stated or implied; distinguish more important ideas from less important ones; understand how information is being used (for example, to provide evidence for a claim or describe a step in a complex process); recognize how pieces of information are connected (for example, in a cause-and-effect relationship); understand many different ways that speakers use language for purposes other than to give information (for example, to emphasize a point, express agreement or disagreement, or convey intentions indirectly); and synthesize information, even when it is not presented in sequence, and make correct inferences on the basis of that information.
Speaking Skills	Level	Your Performance
Speaking about familiar topics	Good(3.5 - 4.0)	Your responses indicate an ability to communicate your personal experiences and opinions effectively in English. Overall, your speech is clear and fluent. Your use of vocabulary and grammar is effective with only minor errors. Your ideas are generally well developed and expressed coherently.
Speaking about campus situations	Fair(2.5 - 3.0)	Your responses demonstrate an ability to speak in English about reading material and experiences typically encountered by university students. You are able to convey relevant information about conversations, newspaper articles, and campus bulletins; however, some details are missing or inaccurate. Limitations of grammar, vocabulary, and pronunciation at times cause difficulty for the listener. However, they do not seriously interfere with overall communication.
Speaking about academic course content	Good(3.5 - 4.0)	Your responses demonstrate an ability to communicate effectively in English about academic topics typical of first-year university studies. Your speech is mostly clear and fluent. You are able to use appropriate vocabulary and grammar to explain concepts and ideas from reading or lecture material. You are able to talk about key information and relevant details with only minor inaccuracies.
Writing Skills	Level	Your Performance
Writing based on reading and listening	Fair(2.5 - 3.5)	You responded to the task, relating the lecture to the reading, but your response indicates weaknesses such as an important idea or ideas may be missing, unclear, or inaccurate; there may be unclarity in how the lecture and the reading passage are related; and/or grammatical mistakes or vague/incorrect uses of words may make the writing difficult to understand.
Writing based on knowledge and experience	Good(4.0 - 5.0)	You responded with a well-organized and developed essay. Weaknesses, if you have any, might have to do with use of English that is occasionally ungrammatical, unclear, or unidiomatic and/or elaboration of ideas or connection of ideas that could have been stronger.

So personally, I think i did quite a OK job :P
but my mom thinks I can do better, and at least score above 100
frankly speaking, I didnt do a lot of preparations for this test, only scanning through the rules and requirements the night before the test...... *guilty* but I suppose, all those literature reading, essay writing wasnt for nothing :P

things I hate..... :(

I hate being weak

I hate having tears

I hate I cant hysterically laugh

I hate making moments awkward

I hate giving others trouble

I hate causing others discomfort without me knowing

I hate facing people when Im depreesed

Recently, I feel lost.....

I need to find myself back

White, Snow :) kalt...

Its December now, the year is about to close, 2008 is coming to an end, but before that, we have Christmas!!! and Snow :) :) its white and pretty :)

If you can personify the four seasons of the year, I would definitely say that Winter is the Queen, who rules with the cold, but has a heart of the mother who cares for her children.

Spring would be the teenage girl, blossoming with love everywhere she goes, bringing happiness to people she cares, cherishes and loves. This is also her time to learn, grow and transfer to a responsible woman.... with Summer ahead, she has a whole 3 months to learn. :)

Summer, would be the woman figure of Spring, she will shine with the brightest sunshine-smile you will ever encounter, she will bring warmth and enlightment to you. She will also let you nourish your love you found in Spring, and bring it to its highest climax. When she smiles down at you, your worries are not worries anymore, they are like the clouds, blown and travel with the wind, to a far away place where it is no longer your concern.

Fall, I would describe her as a grandmother, looking after her other girls, giving them their guides and telling them her own adventures, when its cold, they would all cuddle up in front of the fire place, with a cup of hot chocolate. Fall is a time for memories, happy ones make us smile; funny ones make us laugh, sad ones make us cry, *this is when the annoying autumn rain comes in*

All in all, arnt you happy that its finally Winter, with snow, with Christmas, with New Year ??! :D :D :D

Long night, early morning

With Extended Essay, and tests filling my life, I tend to find myself saying goodnight to the moon and good morning to the sun. The hours of me in my cosy warm bed has decreased from 8-9 hours a day, till only 4-5 hours maximum...... I feel so bad...
I know this is horrible, both physically and mentally, but what else can I do? I need to get the things done!
Grrrrrrr........
*Due to time constriant, Im getting off now*

My beloved family :)

The 2008 SANMUN has ended yesterday. It has been a great and awesome weekend, despite the fact that I was extremely exhausted. It was a yet another unforgettable experience, but it seems to lack something very special for me which I can not remember. The one I went in the beginning of the year, at Harrlem, was a larger conference than this one. However, I enjoyed it all the same :)

This year's soldiers consist most of last years fighters, and also 9 new soldiers joining in the force. Getting together, making new friends, spending the weekend giving excellent ideas, trying to solve some global issues, trying to make a difference, it does not have to be a big difference, it does not have to be very effective, but it has to be voiced. You have a different view than others, you voice them loud. You disagree with others, say it out loud.

This is what MUN is all about, intellectual elites get together, voices are heard, resolutions are made, either pass or failed, you have made an effort. Gaining the experience, building up the courage to talk in front of people, not afraid of making mistakes. This is what Berg MUN has taught me, this is what I learned from this years SANMUN.

All of our fighters have participated actively, have voiced their opinions loud, have made a difference. Some gained a title to bring back home, the Ambassador of Iran, our beloved Co-Head of Berg MUN, won the Best Speaker of all the participating delegates. The Ambassador of Georgia, our wonderful Head of Berg MUN, won the Most Active Speaker. Lets here it for the two of them!!

And of course we have to thank our Commanders, our MUN directors, for the guidance, and help they have offered us, they have sacrificed their weekends to come and supervise us at the conference, always there to answer our queries. Without them, the battle would not have been won so beautifully, the conference would not have even taken place. So we thank you.

The torch has now been handed down to a new generation of soldiers, I hope they would carry on the good work, the good spirit, the same attitude to face the next upcoming battle. Their next stop would be a conference overseas, which sadly, the 3IBs are too busy to attend, our two new heads from 2IB would lead our force with pride, and show them what Berg MUN is made of!

Once again, many thanks to our MUN directors, and my fellow delegates, this has been a wonderful conference and the best memory of my IB life =)

emotional dustbin

Ever wonder why my background is always white, as white as snow, as white as the clouds? I also asked myself the same question, but I do not know......I suppose I want it to remain white is because, it is such an easy colour, so plain, so relaxed, so calm, so innocent, it looks like the colour white does not have any worries, to dirty its surface.
I wish my state of mind would be white, or more logical, 'blank' for the time being, why do I have so many worries, so many thoughts, so many questions, so much stress, so much pressure on my shoulder? I feel polluted. Do you?
My Extended Essay is progressing very slowly, and I am in deep trouble....
My Economics commentary is not perfect, and I am in deep trouble.......
My IOP presentation for English could have been better, and I am disappointed in myself, S and T did such a good job, but I suppose, they are pairing up with someone else then me for the last presentation, and I am in deep trouble.....
My opening speech is going to take place on Sat. morning, and I havnt written it, and I am in deep trouble.....
My TOEFL test will be on the 22nd, 2 weeks from now, what do I need to know, and I am in deep trouble.....
What else do I need to worry about? Not that I want to forget about it, its just tooo much to remember..... what about my other subjects in IB? History? Math? Biology? Chinese? and what am I going to do about TOK? now, I really start to doubt if I can pass and get a diploma....what am I going to do about university?

people have told me the picture I posted on fb looks sad, i somehow agree, but more 'tired' than 'sad' I just want to know when this will all come to an end? When will I be free? When can I let go? I obviously cant let go now, everything I have done so far would crash down on me so hard, I wont have the ability to get up again.......

all these thoughts occupy me day and night, or should I say, haunt me every minute. When I see others who have achieved what I could have but has not, I am so disappointed. I question my self, why cant I do it? Why didnt I do it?
When I see others who have done things which I, myself expected to finish, left there undone, I feel ashamed...
then I arrive to the question that I frequently asked: Am I really suitable to do IB? Does age really matter? Cant being hard-working prove to be helpful?

These are only academical matters....what about matters in other areas? They are also troubling me.......

*sigh~* What should I do?

growing up!

17 years ago, at 8.18 am I said hello to this big fancy and complicated wolrd. I was in Taiwan.
17 years later, at 8.18 am I am sitting in the library finishing my History IA. I am in Norway.

Wow.... I'm finally 17.... I have waited this moment for so long, and now I am 17, it feels the same :P only difference is I have grown, a few tiny inches up and a lot sideways =D I have pierced ears. I have redish middle length hair, I can now understand Norwegian better than German. I have made friends, who I suppose will last forever. I have learned how to control and organize my life, I have learned how to handle things properly. and most important of all, I have taken responsipility of my own actions and doings.

So...is this the definition of 'growing up' ?

how time flies........

Remembering the year 2006,
a year full of new adventures and challenges awaiting me
the first part of that year,
I was happily enjoying my end of 8th year,
with my special Taiwanese friends,
planning tours after graduation.
until that summer,
I was informed,
my dear old father has received a post
once again,
in a country far away from what I have called home for 5 years
once again,
the wings of the steel bird will open for me,
taking me fly,
flying over dreamland
landing in a unknown Paradise.

second half of 2006,
I spent my first winter in a white world
I saw snow for the first time
I skated on ice for the first time
I went skiing in the mountains for the first time
I went to stay at a classmates cabin, north in this white Paradise
I felt like an outsider for the first time
I felt lonely for the first time
but also
I made a few friends who dont share my culture for the first time
I began to speak English all day for the first time
the list goes on and on.......
that year's Christmas, I made a critical decision
which I thought I would regret

2007
I told myself
I will finish 10th grade this year, and the second half of 2007
I will pick up the challenge of
entering IB
making new friends
try and learn Norwegian (which I have not yet fulfilled, and dont think I will anyways :P)
yes indeed
choosing to enter Berg
was the only choice I had,
to do IB and finish right on time
before my dear old dad was ordered back to Taiwan again

so 2007 August
(have been in Norway for 1 year)
I stepped into Berg,
ready for whatever was ahead of me
the hardest thing
was to make friends
all over again
everyone around me spoke Norwegian
I remember the first person I spoke to was A.
he spoke a bit Chinese :)
I was very happy
then it was my Bio HL folks
they were AWESOME!
crazy but awesome <3
not long after school year started
came a week in October
known as the "study" week
I went to Dublin <3
the first turning point of my life in Norway
there, I made, what I would define as, truthful friends
most of them anyways <3
spent 5 days in a lovely city
with lovely music
lovely drinks *cough cough :P*
and lovely people <3

people I would never forget
M, S, F, W,T, the double C,
moving into the closing of 2007 and beginning of 2008
the list went on
M, S, F, W, T, now the triple C, Fu, Ph, the triple S, Ni, L, Pu, N, Bling, An, O, Seb,
and many others :)
and also people who are not in IB :)
It has been my happiest year ever.
quite pathetic it might seem to you,
being happy cuz of making friends
but if you stand at my point of view
changing schools so often
you would come to appreciate friends more than anything else......

we entered the first half of 2008
the Harrlem conference
I learnt quite a lot
not only debating skills,
also a lot of other 'for the first time' experiences
too special to mention :)
and no, they all are very beautiful
and no, they all are legal xD
at this time of the year,
2IB is about to come to an end
ready for 3IB?
I wouldnt say yes....

the summer of 2008 went fast
(August, marking my 2 year period in Norway)
now,
when I look back at what happened in 2IB
they all become a unique experience for me
and I suppose this year will go for the same
but
you can always count on surprises coming at you when you are least expecting it
just yesterday
my dear old dad got his order
it came 3 months earlier than we expected
meaning we are leaving this white Paradise 6 months earlier than I expected!

so many questions raised
so many questions unanswered
so many things to make clear
so many things to do
so many goodbyes to say
so many....so many.....countless
is this why they give you a 3 months prior notice when you are returning to base?

My family will need to leave Norway in the beginning of 2009
I am allowed to stay behind till my exam is finished
so
anyone willing to let me stay with them for the most, 5 months? :)
you will get paid, just like me renting a room ^^

Tomorrow, the double ten, is the national day of Taiwan =P normally this is a holiday for students in taiwan, but no, Im in norway, so I get to go to skole and enjoy another day of joy!! *cough! cough!*

I am so glad I am finished with my first IOP!! I suppose I did well enough to scrap a passing grade <3

I have decided to go to SANMUN at Nesbru International School, I saw that OIS has been given countries too, wonder if I will see any of my old pals ^^ its been toooooo long :) And I have been assigned as Norway....for some reason, the Ambassador......oh well, I suppose the only danger is that when I say sth slightly wrong about Norway, I would get nailed SO bad!!!! And then there's the opening speech I suppose.....is going to get me butterflies in the belly again!! And its the first weekend of November, so I have less than a month to prepare >__<

And its Furu's bd this Sunday!! Happy BD to her!! and there's a party on saturday to celebrate it ^^ very looking forward to it! 

「empty minded」

shoulder to shoulder 

we walked down the path 

spread with fallen maples 

watched over by my guardian angel

I apologize for my mistake 

the discomfort I caused

the stupidness of me

not noticing the hurt in your eyes

you have to give me time

I am inexperienced

age has given me a disadvantage

there are many things I need to learn 

need to get used to

sitting on the cold bench 

watching the beautiful sunset 

chocolate for me

coffee for you

at that moment

my mind was free from all thoughts

all the stress from school

all the displeasure at home

all the worries

once again you spread your wings 

fly towards your next destination 

I cant follow and I wont

but you have my best wishes 

My desicison has not changed

the past two weeks have been great

but

I can only say

I'm sorry

and

Good luck

everything has its first

and so it seems, I had my first too :) but umm..... it didn't go so well, we went to Eldorado (or at least I think this is how it is spelt :P) to watch "Wanted" X( man........I have seen it twice in three days....quite tired of it right now, point is, I didn't get to choose :( and I was toooooo nice to say no, so I watched the first half an hour, then, didn't want to be rude, told him I needed some fresh air :P and never went back! I mean, although I adore AJ. but that doesn't mean I love every film she's in....good thing is I didn't need to pay the tickets, or the dinner before：)
I had Sushi!! and its was pretty expensive :P

now I come to think about it, it was such a total waste of time, I could have spent the whole evening doing my EE. (or would I =P?!) instead of going out, eating sth really expensive and watching a movie I don't enjoy at all, the only good thing is, this will be my first and last time I see him, I really missed him, it was nice seeing him again, how long has it been...hmmm....14 months I suppose, good to know he's still alive and walking about, visiting remote areas, eating the weirdest foods you can think of =)

all in all, according to the Chinese, the first would be your most beautiful and unforgettable memory.....how come I dont get it at all :P :P :P

random note and reminder

Counting down 5 more days till the Autumn break : ) that also means 5 more days till the first draft of Extended Essay. 3 birthdays this week, 1 in the autumn break, 1 after the autumn break+1 party, all turning 18 :P a month and a little bit more days till Halloween and I'm finally one year older ^^

this week's pace has been going rather smooth, with Monday handing in the World Lit, and feeling the relief, Tuesday and Wednesday filled with vast amounts of wried numbers, formulas, equations, important dates for not--so-important events, thought of seriously looking into my economics commentary, but the comments given back are incomprehensible and indecipherable so that piece of work is still sitting on the top of the bookshelf, untouched, covered in dust..... :P Thursday's only interesting part was I didn't have TOK :D it was the first time since 2 IB that I did not start at 8 on normal school days ^^ Friday our lovely English teacher came back, although we were talking about politics, it was kinda interesting :) from my view that is, I personally have no interest in politics :D in the evening, we went to N's place for OWDM meeting, the meeting lasted for 2 hours (?!) :P and then we ate pizza, had candy, tea, coke and they watched 'Wanted!' uhh...... yes, its a film with no plot, too much computerized effect, so me don't like :/

Saturday morning was BORING!! a tour around oslo with 12 old men/lawyers, the only good thing was, they bought me my favorite childhood candy ^^ awwwwwwww~ cant find them here or in SA, invented by the J's but produced in T :) later we went to M's place for IS meeting, watched a film about gold diggers in Mexico, the bandits, Curtin (Me Like :D) Howard, and two who died, Joey, and Dobbis (Or I think that's how you spell the names) sth like that ^^

Time's running, and I'm getting ready for a one-on-one party with a long-not-seen-friend of mine :) better not make a fool of myself, wish me good luck =) and I wish you a pleasant evening!

bye~